Healthy Striving or Perfectionistic Concern?
By Phil Imholte, PsyD, LP, CMPC
As a sport psychologist with a performance and clinical background, I support people who are pursuing effective performance in domains such as sport, business, and the performing arts. These individuals are striving for meaningful lives outside of their performance realm in areas such as relationships, parenting, rest and recovery, and other aspects of their health and well-being.
One psychological phenomenon that shows up across my performance and clinical work is perfectionism. The concept emerged in academic circles in the 1980s and 90s and was later defined as "striving for flawlessness and setting exceedingly high standards of performance accompanied by tendencies for overly critical evaluations of one's behavior (Flett & Hewitt, 2002)". The term has been present in everyday vernacular too, used in throwaway remarks such as “I’m [or they are] a perfectionist” to signal a difference in work habits from one person to another. I find that though academic and public interest in the concept has been present for decades, many performers continue to miss an opportunity to recognize the perfectionist in themselves as a gateway towards growth. In doing so, they also miss the chance to establish more effective patterns of performance and well-being.
The following de-identified, composite case vignettes of “Erica” and “Leo”, give a glimpse into the lives of two people who could benefit from professional inquiry and intervention to account for the impact perfectionism has on performance and mental/behavioral health.
Erica drives straight from leading a virtual board meeting to school pick up, followed by whipping together a quick dinner, tagging along with her youngest to evening activities while her husband takes the other. Once the kids are down, her and her husband watch their show together. She’s executed her day as intended, but there’s a problem -- she can’t get to sleep.
She’s her own worst critic, and the ruminative rehashing and rehearsing keeps her awake for the most the night. Though she’s been the quintessential executive, wife and mother, her focus on being perfect in those domains has interfered with her ability to care for herself and effectively let go of the day. The alarm goes off. Instead of waking up rested, she’s tired and still wired from dwelling on the details of how she could have done things differently in the board meeting.
Leo had a down year in soccer last season. Up until then, he had always been “the guy” on his team, but now it’s hard to tell whether playing against better competition, stress from harder classes, or the ball simply not bouncing his way has put him in a funk.
He’s aware that his on-the-field performance has lagged, and off the field he’s pressing. With every rep at practice that doesn’t go his way, every hint that coaches and scouts might be viewing him as having “lost” his groove, and every possible sign he may not be keeping the pace he needs to maximize his opportunity, he grows increasingly upset. Stuck in a cycle of blaming others and being angered at his circumstances because things are no longer matching the impossible height of his expectations, he spends more time dwelling on what’s not working than putting consistent effort into daily and weekly actions that could help him get back on track.
It’s important for performers to strive for high personal standards, but for those like Erica and Leo, healthy striving can easily tilt into perfectionism that compromises well-being and hinders performance. Studies show that perfectionism, especially when it shows up as harsh self-criticism, dwelling on mistakes, and concerns about others’ perceptions of us, sets the conditions for such a negative impact (Hill et al., 2020).
Professional sport psychology consultation, (e.g., with a Certified Mental Performance Consultant recognized by the Association for Applied Sport Psychology), integrated with licensed mental health support as needed, can help support performers in all fields of sport and life. Get the support you need to keep striving for excellence, respect the totality of who you are, and enjoy your life pursuits without getting hung up on perfectionism and remaining effective at what you do.
Hill, A. P., et al. (2020). Perfectionism in Sport, Dance, and Exercise: An Analytical Review. Sport, Exercise, and Performance Psychology.
Stoeber, J., Madigan, D. J., & Gonidis, L. (2020). Perfectionism is adaptive and maladaptive, but what's the combined effect?. Personality and Individual Differences, 161, 109846.
Phil Imholte, PsyD, LP, CMPC • Therapy Team